On sluggish starters and spicy zucchini bread

Plus a book update!

My starter is currently languishing in the back of the fridge. I’ve poured off hooch, that murky gray liquid that pools on top of a stagnant starter, several times. It’s also a sign that things are still alive underneath, slowly, sleepily chugging along. 

January is an excellent time to start baking again, and I keep thinking of bringing the starter back to bubbly, effervescent life. But I keep putting it off, not quite ready to recommit to the daily prayer of feeding, stirring, discarding. Perhaps that’s because I have plenty of other prayer going on. Since October, I’ve been doing the Exercises of St. Ignatius, a 30-day retreat that Ignatius recognized would not be possible for many people to make, so he allowed for a 30-ish-week version. Essentially, I pray for 45 minutes every morning, six days a week or so (sometimes only 4). I also meet with a spiritual director every other week. That’s a lot of prayer, especially leading others in prayer is 95% of my job as a priest! 

God Talk is an occasional newsletter about seeking and making meaning in the modern world. God is in the name but belief is not required for reading. If you enjoy this news newsletter or know someone you think would, please subscribe and share.

My very wise and wonderful spiritual director recently reminded me about what it’s like when you have too many tabs open on your computer. The first thing I do when my laptop gets sluggish is close tabs and applications. I am certainly feeling sluggish this January, more so than in past years, which I blame not on too many tabs open but a full month of constant. gray. weather. Still, it’s taking every ounce of energy I have to just to keep moving along. There just isn’t enough right now for baking sourdough. 

I share this because a friend recently shared that they hadn’t brought a loaf of store bought bread into their home for years. I felt disappointed in myself. I wrote a book about bread baking for crying out loud! But then I remembered what I wrote in that very book:

There are times when my practice is disciplined, when the peanut butter and jelly sandwiches that make up 75 percent of my son’s diet (the other 25 percent is grilled cheese) are on homemade whole wheat bread, baked weekly in my own trusty oven. Sometimes my practice is on a much looser timeline. No-knead loaves emerge every so often, when I can muster the time or energy between work deadlines and parenting demands. The sourdough starter sits dormant in the back of the refrigerator waiting patiently to be revived. Its maintenance has been sporadically diligent, outright ignored, and everything in between. Like spiritual disciplines, whether meditation or prayer, daily Mass or daily walks, bread is always there, ready for me to return, even when I am not.

This time of year is the most important time to be gentle with ourselves. Usually, that’s an idea that I bristle at. Isn’t that avoidant? Lazy? But when I am honest with myself, I know too well that being gentle, or at least a little less hard on myself, is much harder work than eating a plate of vegetables for every meal of every day in the name of “health.” 

So here’s to letting the starter languish a little while longer. There will be space and time for its revival. There always is. 

Table Talk

I haven’t baked since Thanksgiving, that was a bit of a disaster, if I’m being honest. The details are boring and involve me trying too hard to control time—or at least how long I’d have to stay up and finish baking those incredible old-fashioned dinner rolls from Valerie Lomas. I tried to manipulate nature. I learned my lesson. (And am so thankful for my friend Charlie for swooping in with last-minute Yorkshire puddings. May we all have a kitchen superhero friend like Charlie who can swoop in and save the day.)

Anyway, while the starter may be languishing, I do miss baking. I received Erin Jeanne McDowell’s book Savory Baking for Christmas this year and I finally cracked it open. OH MY GOD. I am the target audience for this book. Garlic Parmesan pancakes with tomato jam? Smoked salmon breakfast buns?! Garlic cookies with tomato jam thumbprints?! I FINALLY know what to do with this last jar of tomato jam from Year 1 of The Pandemic.

What have I been doing these past three weeks not baking from this book? I started with spicy zucchini bread. Don’t tell my kid it’s spicy, though, because he loves it and ate it as an after-school snack yesterday. (Andrew put honey on it and tried to serve it for breakfast but that was rejected.) It’s such a nice break from the ordinary, especially that buttery, salty Panko topping.

Honestly, if you are like me, a baker without a sweet tooth, get this book. All your dreams will come true. I only allowed myself to mark five, OK, six recipes that I will try to start. I love Erin Jeanne McDowell anyway (her kitchen? I want to go to there.), but this book is the long-awaited love letter to all of us salt-tooths out there. 

I’m going to host a brunch just so I can make those smoked salmon breakfast buns (they are like cinnamon rolls, but instead of cinnamon, butter, and sugar, you roll into yeasted bread with salmon and capers and cream cheese.). 

Book Update!

I have a release date on my book The Sacred Life of Bread: Uncovering the Meaning of an Ordinary Loaf! It comes out June 13, this year. I finally get to say this year because it’s 2023! Exciting plans for a launch are underway, but the book is already available for pre-sale at indie and major book retailers. I getting excited to finally share this book with you!

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God Talk is an occasional newsletter about seeking and making meaning in the modern world. God is in the name but belief is not required for reading. (Each newsletter includes stuff about food, too. Because food is my favorite way to understand, seek, and make meaning.) 

If you enjoy this news newsletter or know someone you think would, please subscribe and share.